Using a strap-on can be fun for all sorts of couples and play partners, but it’s not without its challenges. Whether you’re the wearer or the receiver, discomfort and awkwardness can sometimes get in the way of fully enjoying the moment.
For the wearer, issues like pubic bone bruising, chafing, or a lack of stimulation are common. The receiver, on the other hand, might struggle with a lack of control over the depth of penetration, “slipping out” or “missed entry". Both partners may also feel like there is a disconnect between what they’re feeling and where the dildo actually is.
Luckily, there are solutions designed to enhance comfort and control for everyone, making the experience more pleasurable and less awkward!
1. Bumpers or Cushions
Sportsheets OVE Silicone Dildo & Harness Cushion Lavender
One of the most effective tools for increasing comfort and control during strap-on play is a bumper for your dildo. They act as a cushion between the harness and the wearer’s body, helping to stabilize the dildo and reduce pubic bruising. This can make a significant difference for the wearer, especially during longer play sessions!
Banana Pants Shagger Dildo Cushion Blue
For the receiver, bumpers provide more control over the depth of penetration. They can be adjusted to allow for shallower penetration (or “shallowing”), which can be particularly beneficial if deeper thrusts are uncomfortable or undesirable.
Additionally, some bumpers are designed with stimulating textures that can provide clitoral stimulation for the wearer, adding an extra layer of pleasure to the experience.
2. Exploring Different Types of Harnesses
Strap-on-Me Curious Leatherette Harness Rose Gold
The design and style of your harness can have a huge impact on comfort. The most common style is the jock-strap harness, which wraps around the waist/hips and features straps around the thighs (pictured above). While popular, this style may not work for everyone.
Sportsheets Saffron Strap-On Black/Red & Sportsheets Lush Strap-On Harness Purple
When choosing a harness, certain features can enhance both comfort and stimulation for the wearer. A thicker or padded front can prevent chafing, while back support can help distribute the weight more evenly. Some harnesses even come with a pocket to put a vibrating bullet for added pleasure.
Sportsheets Ultra Thigh Strap-On Harness Black & Cal Exotics Accommodator Face Strap-On Beige
If the traditional jock-strap style doesn’t suit you, there are other options to explore. Thigh harnesses, face harnesses, or even going harness-free are all great alternatives. You might find that a different part of your body is stronger and better suited to handle the thrusting, giving you more power and control.
3. Thrusting Dildos: Let Technology Do the Work
Lovense Gravity Bluetooth Thrusting Dildo Red
For those who want to take some of the physical effort out of strap-on play, thrusting dildos can be a game-changer. These dildos can deliver deeper penetration with less effort from the wearer, allowing for a more intense experience for the receiver.
When choosing a thrusting dildo, ensure it’s strap-on compatible, typically with a flared or suction-cup base. However, you’re not limited to harness use—many thrusting dildos can be used on their own, like the Lovense Gravity (pictured above), giving you even more flexibility in how you play!
Strap-on play doesn’t have to be uncomfortable or awkward. By incorporating tools like bumpers, exploring different harness styles, and utilizing thrusting dildos, you can create a more enjoyable experience for both the wearer and the receiver. Whether you’re new to strap-on play or a seasoned pro, these tips can help you navigate any discomfort and focus on the pleasure.
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